J-lo's Nipple Tweaker - an aMyth Investigative Report
   
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Jennifer Lopez's Nipple Tweaker

 

A Myth.com - investigative report:
Jennifer Lopez's Nipple Tweaker

Jennifer Lopez is not "Real"!

"REAL" - genuine & authentic; not artificial spurious, free of pretense, falsehood or effectation. Truly so infact or actuallity

-real, American Heritage College dictionary

   Jennifer's FAMOUS Oscar dress!In a world seemingly full of Super-models, Movie Stars and Superstars, it's always nice to know that deep down, they're no different than the average Joe. Of course, the beautiful people are entitled to perks that would seem odd for most of us.
    Rock group Van Halen insisted on large bowls on M&M's, with the brown ones omitted. Many people think it was the yellow ones, but we who know realize that the green ones make you horny. Another 70s/80s band, Foreignor needed a dozen or so blueberry pies for the after-concert pie fight.
    Johnny Cash always demanded that an American Flag was in full view for his audience. Micky Dolenz and Davy Jones, of Monkees' fame, insured that promoters were contractually obligated to spell the names without a "e" before the "y" in any press releases or marquees.
    Mariah Carey wants to drink her champagne from bendy straws and Mick Jagger said he'd take the brown M&M's that David Lee Roth and Van Halen declined.

  In keeping with the tradition of odd demands for performers, J-Lo, as the not-pretentious Jennifer now likes to be called, wants an all-white dressing room, including curtains, rugs, as well as her make up table.
     While claiming in her songs to be real, she has, in fact, raised the bar in Superstar Excess. Like Mariah Carey, the old bar-raiser, she accepts only Evian bottled water, but J-Lo leaves Mariah in the dust after that.
     Britney Spears is apparently more down-to-earth.stylist's intern tweaking Jennifer's nipple

     Ms. Lopez had/has an unusual pre-nuptial agreement for Ben Affleck, actor and almost husband number 3. After two failed marriages, she drew up a list of rules for him, including having sex four times a week. If Ben was unfaithful she'd get five million dollars. If he lied, she'd get one million. The amount paid to Chris Judd, husband # 2, for her infidelity with Ben has not been disclosed.
     In early 2003, J-Lo and her entourage went shopping at Barney's in New York when the "still-Jenny" got tired of ogling fans and asked her personal shopper if they could close the store so she could shop alone. They had done it for Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow, but management said no to her. The salespeople say she was difficult and demanding.
     In our view, however, she truly raised the bar on "not being real" and diva-dom by having her own personal nipple-tweaker (pictured on the right).
     Most models and actresses manage this somewhat personal photographic 'must do' themselves, but only the I'm Real, Jenny from the Block, has her own NT, as they are referred to in the Stylist's Union
     When asked if they had personal "nipple tweakers", Superstar Lookers Claudia Schiffer, Nikki Schieler, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Brooke Burke each gave our investigator a nasty look that said "NO!", and stormed away.

"Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got
I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block
Used to have a little now I have a lot
No matter where I go I know where I came from
(From the Bronx)
"

-Jenny From the Block, by Jennifer Lopez
Don't ask me where I've been
Or what I'm gonna do
Just know that I'm here with you
Don't try to understand...

 



I'm real What you get is what you see...

-I'm Real, by Jennifer Lopez

I get chills up and down my spine
Whenever I hear that song of mine
When it stops better press rewind
(Play that sh*t again)
Let me hear it one more time....

-Play, by J-Lo

WHO NEEDS A TOWEL?!

Well, when Ms. J-Lo needs a towel, an assistant is patiently waiting for her IN the water, with open towel in hand!

We can only assume that her companion's "towel holder" is to the right of J-Lo's "towel flunky".

"I'm portrayed negatively as spoiled and demanding and an obnoxious person. I'm not like that. I'm the opposite. Of course, the people around me try to make things as pleasant as possible for me."

-To the London Sun, November, 2001Farrah Fawcett

Seventies supermodel and actress Farrah Fawcett, star of television's Charlie's Angels, and the biggest selling poster of all time (left), didn't need a nipple tweaker for this famous photo.
Instead, we're told, a spritz of water and a lite, cool breeze did the trick.

Of course, sometimes the supermodel may get a little "subtle" help from a stylist, or stylist's intern. This is one of the few perks of a low wage internship.


 
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